my boyfriend was in africa visiting his brother who’s been there for about a year with this organization. and i talked to him online the night before last night and we got in a fight over me hanging out with this guy friend of mine. i copied and pasted our convo below, but i just want to know what people think. was he too mean to me about it? or should i not have hung out with the guy?? i really think that he should trust me. is it normal that he got so mad or is it understandable? who’s right? i’m going to be seeing him in about an hour and i don’t know if i should apologize or if he should.
johnnymineral: hi hi hi hi hi!
secontpaige: hi!! babyyyyy i miss you
johnnymineral: i’ll be home tonight. it’s already morning here. your time i’ll be home tomorrow night. late though 
johnnymineral: i’ll see you on sunday
secontpaige: this week was so much longer than seven days. get your *** home my man
johnnymineral: i’m planning on it my girl. and i hope it felt longer than seven days. if time flew by that’d mean you were having fun without me
secontpaige: i wouldn’t dare
johnnymineral: can i ask you something then?
secontpaige: yes sir
johnnymineral: you didn’t hang out with that stream guy right?
secontpaige: his name is river and yeah i did actually
(a few minutes passed)
secontpaige: johnny for the millionth billionth trillionth time there is nothing going on
johnnymineral: i don’t want to talk to you
secontpaige: are you serious? don’t be immature
johnnymineral: i told you to wait for me to get home so that i could be there too. you went behind my back paige. i don’t like that guy and you know that.
secontpaige: you’re saying i shouldn’t get to hang out with someone unless you like him
secontpaige: or her
johnnymineral: no. i’m saying you shouldn’t hang out with someone i don’t like without telling me. especially when i specifically say that i would like to be there
secontpaige: i can hang out with whoever i want. you’re being controlling and unfair. he’s a nice guy. he took me out to dinner and then we got ice cream. he’s not in to me at all.
johnnymineral: jesus christ shut up! i don’t want to hear any more. all he wants is sex.
secontpaige: you can’t just jump to conclusions like that
johnnymineral: yes i can. you’re only 18, you’re young, sexy, and naive to him. he’s some ******* 26 year old guy you work with. you don’t know anything about him.
secontpaige: what does age have to do with it? you’re 24.
johnnymineral: but i’m your boyfriend. i actually care about you. i’m not looking for an easy lay. you know how much i love you. we’ve been together for a year. i would never hang out with anyone behind your back. if you loved me as much as i love you, you wouldn’t have completely disregarded everything i told you and then try to make me sound like the ******* asshole. that was really low of you, and honestly i can’t even believe it. see you sunday. it was great catching up.
secontpaige: you’re so overreacting
johnnymineral: go complain to ocean about it
secontpaige: RIVER
johnnymineral: wow p, i just love it when you say his name. you’re making it awfully hard to be mad at you
secontpaige: you’re being such a dick
johnnymineral: am i? or am i just reacting like any other boyfriend who cares would? maybe i’m a little protective. and maybe i get a really bad ******* vibe from that guy, and i don’t want you to be alone with him. or maybe i’m just one of those overbearingly, dangerously controlling boyfriends who don’t let their girlfriends wear short shorts, or make a call that isn’t screened. either way you still hung out with him without me.
secontpaige: wow. okay then. you win the biggest asshole in africa award!
johnnymineral: and you win the world’s most deceptive ***** award! congratulations honey! love you see you easter morning!
secontpaige: goodbye johnny
johnnymineral: GOODBYE PAIGEY POO
i know its long, you dont HAVE to read, but who’s right??! i really need to knoww (AIM convo with my bf)?
Published By admin On Saturday, March 13th 2010 Under Millionaires Tags: convo, Don't, Know, knoww, Long, Need, read, Really, Right, Who's
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HOLY SHIT TALK ABOUT DRAMA…..
He should apologize.
You did nothing wrong.
i have the same problem with my boyfriend because i have way more guy friends.
you should give it alittle time, he’ll come to you and then you should talk to him about it.
you’re a bitch. imagine if he did that to you you little immature ho. stop rubbing it in, too. wow. did he really need to know what you did with the guy (that he took you out to dinner)?! Jesus Christ, you little stereotypical bitch.
Wow…you’re both in the wrong. For him over-reacting and for you having dinner with another guy.
There’s a bit of a trust issue between you two. You guys need to resolve that.
uh WOW.
the fact that he gets mad when you say his name, thats not good .
i dont tihnk you should apologize .
he should .
you did nothing wrong, he is your friend .
my last boyfried would let me hang out with groups of guys, as long as i let him hang out with his girl friends .
thats rlly immature of your boyfriend .
i dont know what to tell you .
but you need to let him know you can hang out with whoever you want .
good luck =]
wow that was intense. i dont really know how to give you advice on this, but it sounds like you guys really need to just sit down and talk about it. good luck! i hope it works out between you guys.
well like i told you earlier, i think your boyfriend is right. and i think you should apologize. look at the situation from his point of view. you practically went on a date with a guy he really doesn’t like. he told you to wait until he got back so that the THREE of you could hang out, but you hung out during the week he was away. why couldn’t you wait until he came back? i would be really mad at you too. apologize, everything he said is completely understandable.
I think it would have been okay to hang out with him…. but dinner and ice cream could have been a bit much. But your Bf overreacted like A LOT! And he needs to chill out. He shouldn’t have been so mean….
Lol… that was hilarious to read..
He’s right, you know. I mean, it wouldn’t have been as big of a deal as it was if he did like the guy, but he clearly stated he didn’t like him. Being taken out to dinner by another guy.. geez. But I guess the only way you can understand is if you put yourself in his shoes. Let’s say he met someone in Africa. A woman. An attractive woman. And they went out for dinner and he didn’t tell you; A FRIEND brought it up instead. Then he starts saying it was nothing. She meant nothing. They’re not into each other. It was just dinner. Where’s the loyalty in that? How would you feel?
It’s not about being controlling. It’s about being faithful and loyal to one another. You can have your guy friends and he can have his chick friends. It’s what you DO with them and what you do AGAINST your boyfriend that makes it an issue.
ok, i think like you said he is being over contolling you said he was just a friend you dont like him he doesn’t like you if you bf does care about you… you should of said:
if you care about me then you will let me be friends with who i want
i mean it is your life and your friends just tell him that he talk with him himslef and he will see that you guys are just friends maybe he just had a rough day give him a little time to cool down if he loves you like he says he does then he will apologize
hope i helped<3
i kno you dont want to hear this, but your dead wrong. you cant have a boyfriend and let another guy take u out on a date like that if you dont have an open relationship. and also, he’s right, your 18, he’s 26, and he’s taking you out, he’s a nice guy, and your comfortable with him, either one of two things, he’s either gay, or he is trying to get into your pants, which is sounding like its working. dont be so naive.
Honestly, I wouldn’t want my girlfriend to have dinner with another fucking guy.
Now getting icecream or something, sure, that’s cool, but dinner?
Were the lights dimmed, and were there violins playing in the background? Probably.
I think you just need to acknowledge that he cares about you, and he is probably looking out for you, but he has to act appropriately. It seems as though he is a little controlling.
I dated a guy who was like that, he disguised emotional abuse as him “caring for me” and “wanted the best for me” but really, he was using emotional tactics to control me.
Be careful, I’m not sure about your entire situation, but that little convo does shed some light. I see my ex bf in this guy.
Make sure you stand your ground, and let him know that it is not okay to control you like that. On the other hand he probably loves you and wants the best for you, but just be sure to tell him that he can’t treat you like that if he wants to be with you.
good luck
I think u were both wrong. he was being overbearing and telling u what to do but he cares about u and loves u. he was just being protective of u. u were wrong for going behind his back with someone he does not trust. next time u should probably talk to him about it first. how bout u say sorry and wait to see if he forgives you or says sorry too. relationships are based on trust and if you don’t have that you don’t have much. good luck and happy easter!
yea he’s just overreacting
i dont care if my gf hangs with other guys as long as she doesn’t get all lovey-dovey with them.
without knowing the complete situation….I think your bf really cares about you and is worried about the other guy…not you. He seems to trust you but has an issue with this 26 year old guy and I can’t say that I blame him. Not knowing the River guy, I would say that he is into you but I don’t know all the details. Secondly, if you have discussed this guy before and you knew he had an issue with him, you should have not met up with him alone. It sounds like he doesn’t care if you hang out with him, but he doesn’t want you two to hang alone…it depends on several things…how long have you known this other guy…is this fight worth it? Are you willing to lose your current bf just to “hang out” with this other guy?
I would not want to lose a good bf…(without all the facts, he seems like a nice bf) over some guy I work with. It’s not worth the battle with your man.
Well I would think that he cares about you A LOT ! And, he doesn’t want this guy taking advantage of you, and he sure does not trust him.
He does sound a little too overprotective, but he loves you, and as long as he’s not controlling you…it shouldn’t be a problem.
If this is the only person he’s doing it with, then it’s fine. He’s just concerned. The only thing is…You can’t cut off your friends just because your boyfriend doesn’t like him.
You should try talking to your boyfriend about it, you should apologize, but I think he should too. And, try to hang out with this guy River, a lot less.
Your boyfriend does kind of have the right to be mad though. He asked you not to hang out with him while he was away, and you did.
But, again, your friends are your friends. He has to except that. This is a hard situation, but I think your boyfriend really does love and care about you. Your pretty lucky.
If he has bad vibes then I would listen to him. It’s not that he doesn’t trust you, he just doesn’t trust your friend. Just be careful.
wow thats long. lol.
um he is a bit over protective and jeleous……..
thats just how guys can be.
WOW!
sounds like quite the fight.
im not one to take sides but your both right. Your bf did overreact a little and you should have told him. what you need to do is think. Is this fight more important than your realation ship? is being right? Its your call. don’t be asking people you dont know. SO whats more important. If you think that being right is more important than dont appoligize. But if you love him you would. cause thats what i think is more important. Even if it makes you mad, ask your bf before you hang out with river. Screaming into pillow works for anger! xD
so its your choice. But becarful, you never know who can hurt you.
River is definitely too old for you and I totally understand your bf feelings. I am sure he “River, Ocean, whatever” told you there is no harm in having dinner with him, you have to eat. I am sure he also said your bf should trust you. He doesn’t trust Ocean, oops River. I heard this many times when I was young and they always wanted more!! And they are very patient while they get their old hooks in you. Why would you go out with him while your bf was away? That seems odd to me. He is right, the older man only wants sex. You are young and it would just be another notch in his belt to have layed a young girl. Your bf is 24 almost too old for you.Right on the border I would say.If your bf asked you not to go out with him “Ocean, River”untill he could meet him too, I think you were definitely in the wrong. I think you owe your bf an apology and never go out with “River” ever again IF you want to keep your bf. WOW, that really was long!
Is Johnny your first boyfriend? I can see that you have A LOT to learn here, Paige. About men and relationships, and if you want to keep this boyfriend of yours, you had better listen and listen good! I am going to level with you…
I would not trust you if you were my girlfriend…..any trust that you had…gone. And you deserve it. He has every right to question you about Stream. You were ALONE with another guy. ALONE! Doesn’t matter if you knew there was nothing going on, your boyfriend doesn’t believe you. You willingly put yourself in a comprimising position…what did you expect your boyfriend to say to you…aww honey, thats so great, I love you for hanging out with another man alone?
You hung out with someone your boyfriend hates and doesn’t trust. And you hung out with him when your boyfriend told you that he wanted to be there for it. Sounds like you are really selfish and don’t care about your boyfriend at all. You went behind his back and hung out with another guy alone. You get the TERRIBLE girlfriend award. And yes, any guy that gets you alone, wants to have sex with you. He took you out for dinner and ice cream…WAKE UP! There is no such thing as guy friends…unless they are married or gay.
You are wrong….you were wrong to hang out with a guy that your boyfriend hates…and you were wrong that you did it when he was gone.
When you have a boyfriend, you don’t get to do whatever you want to do. When there is someone else involved with you, especially one that loves you, you need respect, and understanding, and honesty.
Do you want your boyfriend hanging out with girls you don’t like, alone when you are out of the country?
Again, you have a lot to learn about men, and relationships and you need to start growing up and being far more mature then you are. 18….I passed that 11 years ago. And I thank god that I did.
well he was kinda rude but i totally understand his point. You should have told him ahead of time. Now it seems as though you wanted to go with this river guy, but you knew very well he would not let you, since he had already stated he did not like him, so you took advantage of the situation and went out while your bf was gone. Now im not saying you hanging out wiht friends is wrong, because you need to have your friends and he needs to have his. Switch positions with him real quick, and imagine a girl you felt threathened by, one that you felt your bf could fall for and she could make a move on him. Imagine you tellign him how uncomfortable you felt around her and then you go out of town just to find out he was with her after you’ve explained how you feel. You see? its not so much about the going out, but its the betrayal on the emotional part. He stated his feelings and you didnt take them into consideration, instead you only focused on what you felt. I did a similar thing once. I had recently met a guy and my bf and i had about a year at this time. This guy would ask me every so often to hang out but i alwasy said no. Well one time my bf went on a trip and i took it upon myself to hang out with this other guy. It was a group of friends and i made sure nothing happened, but inside i knew i had provoked it. I realize now i did it because it was something, new and different. I could enjoy myself without having my bf right there. So maybe you should also focus on why you like hanging otu with this river guy so much. I know you’re thinking he’s just my friend, but honestly when you have a bf that you really are crazy about, you usually want to spen most of your time wiht them, so figure it out and work things out with your bf. You also need to choose who you want, cause pretty soon you’re going to either have to get rid of one of them, or u will end up losing the other.
Well i hope you 2 are all sorted out now =].
and lol u probley will not read this but
i had the same thinng too but
he is right sort off because he
loves you & cares forr you and if he dont like the
boy you was “”hanging”" with then you should
atleast make sure he/ one of hes m8s was there
2 make sure u didnt do anythink because
come on!! takes you out for dinna!! thats like a first
date babe xx & i was only 14 when i told my boyfriend
2 STOP being protective & then he wasnt & i got called
named and all that but it is better 2 have a boyfriend that cares
& loves you then have a boyfriend tht couldnt give 2 SH*Ts about you!!!
hopee i helped who eva =] xx
lovee Demi x